YES!
We received Visa approval. Or HE was approved, whatever. You get the drill.
that was it! it's the big call! the "honey, i think it's time" moment.
So I am buying tickets (yes, 4 there, 5 coming back) to Manila. the biggest layover is in Seattle - so we may fly out the night before and just stay with Grandma for one last night. Grandma is ALWAYS good for grandkids.
so it is looking like 3/3 - 3-11 ish. and YES that means my 40th birthday will be spend doing one of the best things of my life!
yipppeeeee!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Skyping with Rey
We get to Skype with Rerey every so often. Normally the line breaks down, or the picture is horrid - or the sound is bad. This was an exceptional call, on New Year's Eve - the boys were really connecting.
We would like to provide newer equipment to the orphanage so more families can begin connecting to their kids faster. It is a tremendous help - i know i will look back fondly to the good ol' days! (but i really can't wait to get his fanny here in the US!)
We would like to provide newer equipment to the orphanage so more families can begin connecting to their kids faster. It is a tremendous help - i know i will look back fondly to the good ol' days! (but i really can't wait to get his fanny here in the US!)
so you hear we're having a yard sale...
you may have read the note coming home last week saying that some friends are having a yard sale to benefit the Orphanage in Manila where our son is currently lives. Folks have been asking me a few questions about it, and i am guessing that there are more people wondering - they just don't ask. so here are a few questions and answers for you - i'll post more as they come.
another reasoning behind sending money is that often what we have to send is not what they need. For example, a used laptop (or computer peripherals or whatever) may not work with the power there - we'd be better off purchasing the items there - we have connected with many people there who will do our legwork.
You may have heard that we're bringing vitamins and other things - we will be bringing a suitcase for Rey to use coming back - and it WILL be packed full of supplies that are expensive, rare, or just a treat (hershey bars!!).
we believe strongly that we need to continue to provide support to this great orphanage. They do amazing work there. If you want to talk to me more about their outreach and loving support, i'd be happy to talk!
On a side note, we are so thankful to have a supportive community around us. This will be a really bittersweet time for a lovely boy leaving the only life he has ever known. You will be a huge part of helping him feel secure and rooted. Providing support to his friends back in Manila is an extremely large part of this. Thank you thank you thank you.
- When is it?
- Why can't we just ship items directly there? Why do we need to send money?
another reasoning behind sending money is that often what we have to send is not what they need. For example, a used laptop (or computer peripherals or whatever) may not work with the power there - we'd be better off purchasing the items there - we have connected with many people there who will do our legwork.
You may have heard that we're bringing vitamins and other things - we will be bringing a suitcase for Rey to use coming back - and it WILL be packed full of supplies that are expensive, rare, or just a treat (hershey bars!!).
- The sale is after you return, don't you need the money to give them? If you have Rey home, why do you want to send money there?
we believe strongly that we need to continue to provide support to this great orphanage. They do amazing work there. If you want to talk to me more about their outreach and loving support, i'd be happy to talk!
- Can I just give a little money?
On a side note, we are so thankful to have a supportive community around us. This will be a really bittersweet time for a lovely boy leaving the only life he has ever known. You will be a huge part of helping him feel secure and rooted. Providing support to his friends back in Manila is an extremely large part of this. Thank you thank you thank you.
Monday, January 4, 2010
January Update 2010: hurry up & wait.
January again, and Rey is still in Manila. We are still here. Yes, this takes a long time. In fact, we've been at this since july 2008, making January month 19.
So far, we plan to be traveling to Manila in March. We chose March - we really have no clue - no vote... In reality, here's how the process works: Mid-December, we got an email from one of the agencies with which we work, and they told us that our paperwork made it to one of the 'gates' that is generally a 10 week mark. So, simple math - plus a few weeks for good measure - puts us at spring break. Late March.
The next step for us is that we will get notification of our 30 day window. Basically, they give us a month to get there and back home.
While we wait, much is going on all over the place. The Hague is busy approving us (and we have already had a hiccup with them this last week) - They have a hand in the adoption process as an international court system with new laws adopted in 2009 that are in place to control human trafficking. You can imagine that adding another government - let alone, an international court system, does nothing but create more hoops. It is a sad reality, but necessary.
Rey will have to submit to some medical testing. There is TB in the Philippines, so he has to take a cough test, and if he comes back positive, he has to take medicine - which is no small feat. It is my understanding that the medicine is administered across town at the hospital - often, for many many weeks - and then re-tested. When you consider traffic in Manila & the major endeavor to assign a valuable resource like a social worker to one child...well, you'll know why we are praying that he remains healthy.
and of course there's stuff i don't even know is happening. my understanding is an inch deep and a mile wide!
I pray for speed and that all the issues that crop up are hidden from me until they are solved! So far, that is pretty much the case. :)
So far, we plan to be traveling to Manila in March. We chose March - we really have no clue - no vote... In reality, here's how the process works: Mid-December, we got an email from one of the agencies with which we work, and they told us that our paperwork made it to one of the 'gates' that is generally a 10 week mark. So, simple math - plus a few weeks for good measure - puts us at spring break. Late March.
The next step for us is that we will get notification of our 30 day window. Basically, they give us a month to get there and back home.
While we wait, much is going on all over the place. The Hague is busy approving us (and we have already had a hiccup with them this last week) - They have a hand in the adoption process as an international court system with new laws adopted in 2009 that are in place to control human trafficking. You can imagine that adding another government - let alone, an international court system, does nothing but create more hoops. It is a sad reality, but necessary.
Rey will have to submit to some medical testing. There is TB in the Philippines, so he has to take a cough test, and if he comes back positive, he has to take medicine - which is no small feat. It is my understanding that the medicine is administered across town at the hospital - often, for many many weeks - and then re-tested. When you consider traffic in Manila & the major endeavor to assign a valuable resource like a social worker to one child...well, you'll know why we are praying that he remains healthy.
and of course there's stuff i don't even know is happening. my understanding is an inch deep and a mile wide!
I pray for speed and that all the issues that crop up are hidden from me until they are solved! So far, that is pretty much the case. :)
Saturday, September 5, 2009
bittersweet reality
I have recurring dreams of the day we pick up Rerey. I have vignettes outlined in my head with a few variations: the weather, the air quality (guaranteed to be BAD), the mood of our children. I even worry about (i'll be delicate here) rough tummies and bumpy car rides. I imagine the orphanage, the joy of walking out the door...everything!
Today i received an email from a wonderful woman who traveled to the PI to pick up her son. I just have to share what she wrote. I removed names and edited to give her privacy - but this is such a bittersweet picture of the process; i have to share it.
"We arrived at our hotel at 1:00 am slept for 6 hours and then up for breakfast, repack and then our 3 hours long car ride (white knuckle, praying for Jesus to keep us safe and the pedestrians running in the road safe and avoiding throwing up in the back seat!) SO much poverty that we saw along the drive, so many street kids, begging for money, so much filth and danger, ohhh it made my heart hurt. I was glad to get out of the car to arrive at the orphanage.
J is AWESOME!!! So happy, so talkative, English is getting better, so helpful and smiley. Very busy, very very busy! He is the oldest child here and very helpful to the staff. There are 24 other kids here most five and under. There are five babies - twins that are one month but new born size, a 4 month old that is 2 month size, a 1 month old AND a 5 day old baby! I've been able to hold the babies and feed them, sometimes I hold 2 at once because I can't stand to see them cry and the staff is so busy. They have their hands FULL.
I have also been holding and playing with the toddlers and the preschoolers. I've been hugged, kissed, hair pulled, hit, screamed at (by a little one that didn't want me to put him down), hugged again, climbed on and peed on - such fun! Yesterday my heart hurt so bad that I finally had to excuse myself after night time devotions with the kids and go take a shower and go to bed. As good as this orphanage is (and it is FULL of love) the kids don't get the attention that only a mommy and daddy can give and the streets are FILLED to the BRIM with kids and young adults and adults and pregnant ladies that exist on $3 - $5 per day, it's an endless cycle. It's overwhelming to say the least. My heart aches.
On a lighter note - J loves bringing me to his friends, he insists that I help lead nightly devotions with the kids and he is very affectionate to me and some to Lola K. I couldn't ask for any more. He talked to daddy on the phone and said "I love you".
Well enough for now. Tonight is our last night at the orphanage. In some ways I can't wait to leave. To leave the rain and humidity, to leave the crying kids that I can't take home, to leave the cold shower and unfamiliar food, to leave the flies and LONG days (up at 5:30) but in other ways, I want to stay - stay forever to hold these babies when they cry. To play with the toddlers when they want to, to read to the pre-schoolers, and on and on - ugh such conflict in my soul."
Much easier to imagine now, isn't it? It's one of the odd juxtapositions of adoption. This is the breaking of our hearts for children who simply want someone to be "Mommy and Daddy". We want to help the ones being left behind, but want to get our new child home. What makes it worse is the knowledge that there's no way for one family - or in the case of our group, 10 families - to provide homes for all these children.
Now I am imagining driving through the streets of Manila with Rey, Coop, and Henry looking out the windows at the poverty and the dangerous conditions. I imagine their little hearts breaking as we leave the other children behind. 2 kids' relief at the promise of "regular" food...their beds, one child's anxiety at leaving the only life he's known...
Just thinking about it.
Today i received an email from a wonderful woman who traveled to the PI to pick up her son. I just have to share what she wrote. I removed names and edited to give her privacy - but this is such a bittersweet picture of the process; i have to share it.
"We arrived at our hotel at 1:00 am slept for 6 hours and then up for breakfast, repack and then our 3 hours long car ride (white knuckle, praying for Jesus to keep us safe and the pedestrians running in the road safe and avoiding throwing up in the back seat!) SO much poverty that we saw along the drive, so many street kids, begging for money, so much filth and danger, ohhh it made my heart hurt. I was glad to get out of the car to arrive at the orphanage.
J is AWESOME!!! So happy, so talkative, English is getting better, so helpful and smiley. Very busy, very very busy! He is the oldest child here and very helpful to the staff. There are 24 other kids here most five and under. There are five babies - twins that are one month but new born size, a 4 month old that is 2 month size, a 1 month old AND a 5 day old baby! I've been able to hold the babies and feed them, sometimes I hold 2 at once because I can't stand to see them cry and the staff is so busy. They have their hands FULL.
I have also been holding and playing with the toddlers and the preschoolers. I've been hugged, kissed, hair pulled, hit, screamed at (by a little one that didn't want me to put him down), hugged again, climbed on and peed on - such fun! Yesterday my heart hurt so bad that I finally had to excuse myself after night time devotions with the kids and go take a shower and go to bed. As good as this orphanage is (and it is FULL of love) the kids don't get the attention that only a mommy and daddy can give and the streets are FILLED to the BRIM with kids and young adults and adults and pregnant ladies that exist on $3 - $5 per day, it's an endless cycle. It's overwhelming to say the least. My heart aches.
On a lighter note - J loves bringing me to his friends, he insists that I help lead nightly devotions with the kids and he is very affectionate to me and some to Lola K. I couldn't ask for any more. He talked to daddy on the phone and said "I love you".
Well enough for now. Tonight is our last night at the orphanage. In some ways I can't wait to leave. To leave the rain and humidity, to leave the crying kids that I can't take home, to leave the cold shower and unfamiliar food, to leave the flies and LONG days (up at 5:30) but in other ways, I want to stay - stay forever to hold these babies when they cry. To play with the toddlers when they want to, to read to the pre-schoolers, and on and on - ugh such conflict in my soul."
Much easier to imagine now, isn't it? It's one of the odd juxtapositions of adoption. This is the breaking of our hearts for children who simply want someone to be "Mommy and Daddy". We want to help the ones being left behind, but want to get our new child home. What makes it worse is the knowledge that there's no way for one family - or in the case of our group, 10 families - to provide homes for all these children.
Now I am imagining driving through the streets of Manila with Rey, Coop, and Henry looking out the windows at the poverty and the dangerous conditions. I imagine their little hearts breaking as we leave the other children behind. 2 kids' relief at the promise of "regular" food...their beds, one child's anxiety at leaving the only life he's known...
Just thinking about it.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
November to May
Well, it has been so silent over the last few months! I wish i could say that it's because we have been moving and grooving with adoption paperwork and getting the $$ together and all that or traveling to the PI...
but that's not it.
Out biggest slow down has been the recession that gave us the one-two punch starting in October. For a contracted consultant, that spelled t-r-o-u-b-l-e! Contracts were suspended and work re-focused and essentially, we went without pay until May. I will not even go into the April 15th "situation", but let's just say it was a dark day.
Thankfully, we had planned for the unfortunate emergency, and did not go into debt in these months. (let me be honest, we could see it from where we were sitting...but we were rescued just in time!) Suffice to say that David has secured work with reliable partners - and as a bonus, he enjoys them. Things are picking up financially, but we are still making up for the several months of "salary sabbatical".
We are back on the horse, applying ourselves to the paper chase daily. My goal is to have everything assembled and mailing to Ellen (a most wonderful social worker in Maryland) by 6/13. I am probably dreaming, as often paperwork involving several parties is s-l-o-w. But a girl can dream.
So it is coming down to money and time. We need time to chase the papers daily through the loops. If you read one of my first entries, it was full of frustration as we fill out the same info in 3 or 4 places...and call around to find that some of the forms are wrong, or that we have to re-do because of work changes...(For example, right now i have 2 forms to folks that have to get them signed and notarized, and returned to me. Then i have 2 applications that are nearly complete, but need a few chunks of info. We are re-doing some financial forms and then re-submitting to our local agency and wait for the fix there - and then when she's done we can assemble and send things to Maryland. I have a grant application (thank GOD) and will work on that today too. Lastly, employment reference letters are due.) And that does not complete the dossier checklist.
So that's where we are. We are struggling for time to do all the million things, there's a lot of "hurry up and wait" and then the overwhelming feeling that if i am not making progress, i just am not trying hard enough. Watching other families come back from the PI with their child is goose bumps and jealousy. And i have a feeling that we're going to need to put on a fundraiser soon. I won't diatribe on this, but i struggle with turning my family into a charity project. And it is hard to hear the "why is it so expensive" comments all the time. I'll discuss THAT later. but i have to say it doesn't matter. We'll pay it to get Rey here.
but that's not it.
Out biggest slow down has been the recession that gave us the one-two punch starting in October. For a contracted consultant, that spelled t-r-o-u-b-l-e! Contracts were suspended and work re-focused and essentially, we went without pay until May. I will not even go into the April 15th "situation", but let's just say it was a dark day.
Thankfully, we had planned for the unfortunate emergency, and did not go into debt in these months. (let me be honest, we could see it from where we were sitting...but we were rescued just in time!) Suffice to say that David has secured work with reliable partners - and as a bonus, he enjoys them. Things are picking up financially, but we are still making up for the several months of "salary sabbatical".
We are back on the horse, applying ourselves to the paper chase daily. My goal is to have everything assembled and mailing to Ellen (a most wonderful social worker in Maryland) by 6/13. I am probably dreaming, as often paperwork involving several parties is s-l-o-w. But a girl can dream.
So it is coming down to money and time. We need time to chase the papers daily through the loops. If you read one of my first entries, it was full of frustration as we fill out the same info in 3 or 4 places...and call around to find that some of the forms are wrong, or that we have to re-do because of work changes...(For example, right now i have 2 forms to folks that have to get them signed and notarized, and returned to me. Then i have 2 applications that are nearly complete, but need a few chunks of info. We are re-doing some financial forms and then re-submitting to our local agency and wait for the fix there - and then when she's done we can assemble and send things to Maryland. I have a grant application (thank GOD) and will work on that today too. Lastly, employment reference letters are due.) And that does not complete the dossier checklist.
So that's where we are. We are struggling for time to do all the million things, there's a lot of "hurry up and wait" and then the overwhelming feeling that if i am not making progress, i just am not trying hard enough. Watching other families come back from the PI with their child is goose bumps and jealousy. And i have a feeling that we're going to need to put on a fundraiser soon. I won't diatribe on this, but i struggle with turning my family into a charity project. And it is hard to hear the "why is it so expensive" comments all the time. I'll discuss THAT later. but i have to say it doesn't matter. We'll pay it to get Rey here.
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